An amazing and generous contribution from E! Thanks for sharing your most personal inner world! I learn so much from every personal story:

Let me try and contextualize it for you.

My mind often times feels as though I don’t know which way is up. For so long it has been a constant state of panic that truly the smallest thing would make me lose track of my thoughts and myself. I would forget where i just put things down, wouldn’t be able to concentrate on a task no matter how badly i wanted to, and eventually tried everything to simply not even engage with thoughts because they always concluded with a critical view point on myself.

But while all this was happening the only feeling i could ever express was, “ i feel bloated.”

I felt my depression in my gut. and sometimes i have days when i still do. it’s taken a lot of hard work to sift through what’s an actual physical feeling I’m having, and what is a destructive thought that i am having and how can i reconstruct it. guys, the mind gut connection is REAL. and it can work against you, but we are here to make it work for you.

some things that help me:

1. express yourself. your shit, and i literally mean your SHIT, is not trivial. it’s not gross, its not unworthy of your attention, it shouldn’t be ignored, and its a primal function of your body that you indeed have a right to. if your unpleasant with your experience of how your bodily self cleanses, that is worth exploring for yourself. i also hope that maybe this information will help some people learn that your physical sensations in your gut can be heavily tired to your emotions. voice them, keep track of them, treat them with care and concern. don’t ignore it. i spent every night my sophomore year of college in pain sitting in the library i was so bloated RUMINATING over the salad i ate. and guess what. it had nothing to do with the salad. it was a physical experience of a very aggressive anxiety/depression cycle that was not being treated. i would never wish this on anyone so please for the love of god express yourself!! everyone is entitled to feelings about their shit and if you’re reading this post, its probably in your best interest to express it. we won’t judge.

2. alkaline morning and calming night. ok this was is a biggie for me. get to know your bodily patterns. both mental and physical. what time of day do you like to go to the bathroom? right when you wake up? right before bed? after a big cup of coffee? you have no idea it just happens (or doesn’t)? notice it! for me, starting my day with celery juice has been a life changer. i know this sounds absolutely ridiculous and i have a doctor for an older sister and would never tell her i believe in this ritual, but it helps me a lot. i feel much more energized, hydrated, and awake after a glass of celery juice than any tea or kombucha or what have you. it not only signals to my body that, “Hi i love you lets wake up now.”, it also signals to my mind that i don’t need to GO GO GO with the caffeine and get shit done, i need to have a second and be with myself before i decide what’s for breakfast, or run to the train, or the gym or whatever i need to do that morning. at night, i oftentimes have a hard time winding down. even tried sleeping pills, and honestly the best thing for me was tea. now sometimes, lets be real, it doesn’t always happen that i get my whole lovely self care night time ritual with candles and chamomile and a fucking lavender bath. sometimes I’m out drinking, or with friends, or honestly in such a terrible head space that even bathing seems to hard. the great thing about tea is that 1. it helps with hangovers, 2. you can take it ANYWHERE, and 3. its one easy thing to do to release tension in your body, calm you body down, and at least make you pretend that sleep will come and be the best thing ever.

3. essential oil. being bloated is not fun. don’t look in the mirror. don’t shame yourself for having extra gas in your belly, because it will not make it go away. your body will do its job and regulate and only acceptance will make this experience less awful. when it does happen, i feel a lot better knowing that i can lie down with some lavender oil in my hand and run my belly. it helps move the gas down, calm the body, and makes you feel like you are taking action.

4. charcoal. ok i may have an addiction to dirty lemon but ill be the first to admit its absolutely ridiculous and you can make this cognition yourself if you have experienced the wonderful effects of a little charcoal in your belly. now, don’t over do it. charcoal does bind to toxins and gas in the body and help it get out, but it can also reduce the effectiveness of medication and get rid of the good stuff you have in your intestine lining as well. look at the instructions and use the suggested amount and only do it when you feel bloated. charcoal from coconuts are the best I’ve experienced and also the easiest to come by. its lovely mixed with some lemon juice and perhaps maple syrup if you’re extra fancy. you can even put some vodka in there if your trying to be super paradoxical.

5. colonics. there is an excellent goop article on this subject, but i can say from personal experience that waling out of your colonic appointment knowing you have just taken the biggest shit of your life is truly a phenomenal feeling. at one point i was eating so many raw veggies that there was just no way my body could break down and expel all that green stuff on its own. colonics helped me become motivated to eat in a more balanced way to help myself do that on its own. its also important to take a colon supporting probiotic after an appointment since ya just got rid of all your gut bacteria.